The Rainer's » Striving to Live According to God's Calling

Ian has been wanting to ride the bus for a very long time. His older siblings have been doing it for years. He liked to walk down to the bus stop with them and wait and was sad every time that he didn’t get to get on. So, today was the big day. Today, he got to ride the bus to school. I would not even consider it if he didn’t have the big kids to keep him safe. But he does. So he gets to ride.

Waiting for the bus. No where in sight.

Ah! Here is comes! So exciting!

Up he goes. He just looks so tiny, climbing up those big stairs. The big three follow him on. I called a reminder to them to be sure and sit with Ian.

The doors closed.

Take a big breath. He will be ok.

I walked down a ways to try and see him through the window and be sure someone was sitting with him. The windows were tinted. I couldn’t really see through them well. But then I heard a little knock. I went back up toward the front. There he was, sitting with Olivia. Both of them were waving. He could barely see out the window. He’s just so tiny. I felt the sting of the tears in my eyes, that I did not shed yesterday, on his first day. Seeing him in a room filled with a bunch of kids his same size was just not a problem for me. Seeing him dwarfed by the size of that bus was something else entirely.

But I know he will be fine. He has Noah, Jonah, and Olivia to take care of him. And I’ll meet them down at the bus stop this afternoon to greet him coming off the bus. With my camera.

Ian is my baby. So is Emily. They have a special bond. I’m not sure if it has to do with Ian’s long, arduous home birth that Emily was present for, or if it’s something else, totally intangible. But they are connected. So, after Ian got up at 6:15 to get ready for school, Emily called via FaceTime on the iPhone so she could see Ian and wish him well for his first day of school. It was very sweet. If I were on the ball, I would have taken a couple of pictures of them video chatting. You have to cut me some slack. After all, I was awakened at 6:15. That’s about an hour earlier than usual, and on a night when I was awakened through out a couple more times than is usual. Including once by Ian. Tom had to go snuggle him back to sleep. I was awake the whole time, nursing Elena.

Ian has been looking forward to kindergarten for 2 years. I’ve been telling him for two years that he gets to go to school when he’s 5. Thankfully, school starts shortly after his birthday. I could have spent the last 8 months trying to explain to him why he wasn’t going yet, even though he met the requirement of turning 5. But as it works out, we bought school supplies even before his birthday, so he was assured that he would be going when every one else started.

When we met his teacher on Monday, she gave him two home work assignments. One included a project to show he could count. He was to glue items of the appropriate amount into each of 10 squares, containing the numbers 1-10. Olivia helped him with it. They have fun. I would have helped. But I was pushed aside by those far more capable. We had a tiny crisis this morning involving a couple of items coming off and being reglued, and then another item falling off on the way to school. We tucked that bead safely into his homework folder. I’m sure it was fine.

Because Ian was so eager to go (6:15? Really??), we were the very first to arrive on the kindergarten side. There were already several 1st graders lined up. Well, the early bird and all that… he got to have the honor of being the “Line Leader” to go inside. Taking the lead on the first day. That’s my boy! We stood in line about 10 min. I was instructed to start the timer on my phone. He likes things like that. I set it for 5 min. It went off and they didn’t open the doors yet, so I set it for another 5 as instructed by the “Line Leader.” Thankfully, we were led in before it went off again.

After a “dome cinco” at the door, we headed in and put his folder away as instructed on Monday. The kids then all piled up their back packs on one table so supplies could be taken care of. No further instructions were received, so I had Ian hunt down his name on a desk. Success was found! In fact, he’s sitting in almost the exact same spot in his room that Olivia occupies in her own room. Finally, instructions came and naturally, we did the wrong thing. The correct thing was to go to the reading rug and select a book to look through. I thought Ian picked an apropos title, don’t you? But before he did that, he had to check out the class pet – an albino corn snake. Cool. I like snakes.

After taking a few pictures of him looking at his book, he simply said, “Bye, Mom.” Wow. Dismissed. Um, can I at least have a hug? He complied and gave me a big hug. I told him I love him and to have a good day. Whatever, Mom. He had books to look at and new friends to make. I just say, I was quite surprised. When I drop him off on Sundays for Sunday School, he often doesn’t want to go into the class and I have to come in with him, get him started playing with something and then leave, but he never tells me I can leave. I always tell him I’m leaving and he often looks unsure. The class room teachers are awesome so I know it’s not that. He was just so excited to go to kindergarten that I think his desire to be there over whelmed any uncertainty he may have had.

To my credit, I did not cry. I was not emotional. Well, not overly so. I’m very proud of him and was very happy to see him acclimating so well. I begin to think that all my stress and worry over the summer about whether or not he should go was a big, giant waste of time. I can’t wait to see him in an hour and hear all about his first day.

A parting shot of all the moms who got to hang around longer after I was sent away. I’m so happy my guy is so confident and sure of himself that I could leave so easily.